WOW! And I say it louder.

When we are young we all do this. We are stubborn. We dont listen to anyone but ourselves. We dont want help from anyone because we want to prove we are an adult and can be self sufficient.  We get this immense feeling of freedom at 18 that just makes us want to rebel against everything…

We all need that immature new adult life, where we make mistakes, try new things, love, have your heart broken, get into trouble, loose close family or friends, make new friends, live on our own, etc.  It helps further define who we are as people and sharpen us to be a real adult, with responsibilities.

Getting closer to 30 though, it seems we all have this time when we start to become more aware of how we are as a person.  What we want in life.  What makes us truly happy.

The more that we become aware of how we act and what we do, the more mature we become.

It’s fun, cause looking back over the past 5~10 years, I know I did this, I know people told me I was wrong, and I didn’t listen to them.  Now I find myself telling the younger generation the same things and those people don’t want to believe it either. I hope I can be there in the next 10 years to have a laugh with them as they realize the same thing. They will become self aware and thus mature as well.

Becoming self aware is a sign of real maturity.

One of the moments in life that changed the way I think.

I was at work one day.  A older guy came in, prolly around 60~70.  As I was helping him, we talked.

He asked if I was married.  I remember chuckling and I said, ‘I am only 22′.  He went on to tell me how long he had been married.  Something like 50 years or something, I don’t recall the exact number, but stopped dead in his track and looked at me, stared sincerely in my eyes and asked me.

‘You know why I am still married?’

The look in his eye, the way he asked that.  I was confused and curious.  I still remember it clearly.

His answer was powerful.

‘We both are too stubborn to leave each other…  That my boy, that’s called love.’

I still think back on that.  Too stubborn to leave each other.  What does that really mean.

When ever I meet a new woman, I ask myself that. ‘Will I be too stubborn to leave this one? Will she be too stubborn to leave me?’

Love is an interesting emotion.  It can feel different for different people.  It makes us feel happy, sad, and angry.  Yet, we all, deep down inside, long for it.  We all want to be loved, and to love someone.  To grow old and enjoy life together.  To have a family of our own, whether that be kids or animals in the family you share.

I may not be at that point in my life to settle down.  The thought it nice though.  I will work on finding someone I am too stubborn to leave first.  Then go from there.

Will you be the one?

My first trip alone. My first time flying. My first time riding in a taxi. My fist time seeing the Atlantic Ocean. My first time being on the east coast.

The first 4 hours were amazing. The next 68 were horrible.

Someone owes me big time…

Now it’s all kinda like…

“Best always” that is.

This is one of those games you really must try.  There is no explaining it, just go and download it.  I play it on and off when I am in between other MMOs.  I have 4 lvl 50s and a few low lvl toons as well.  I have half my toon sspecced STR and other half specced CHA.

My highest lvl toon is Kamu on oobag. He is a a Will o’the Wisp Ilusioner.  I also have a Skraeling Mu-Fu Monk with 346 STR too!

Oh, and on the forums, I found this epic post. Had to share it.

Hi, I am new to this game, but I think I have found a home. I have been into MMO for sometime now and this game looks like the next WOW! I currently have a level seven (crossing my fingers to hit level 8 tonight) double wookie bastard lunatic. I am not sure if I want to play this character as my main or my alt. Anyways I have a ton of questions that I was hoping to have answered. I don’t want to waste time searching the forums because that is clearly time away from advancing my character. First off, I joined the Pemptus server since that one seems to be running the PVP roleplaying ruleset. My questions in no particular order are:

What is the best character for an alt and/or mule?
I went out and bought a G15 keyboard for this game and can’t find any macro for it. I have written a few of my own, but does anyone have any that the can share.

Where can I get the CE edition of the game? I am pretty sure I am running the demo and/or an early beta version because I just upgrade my graphics card to a DX10 Nvidia 9800 and still can’t get the graphics to come on but I am progressing so I am not too concerned since I didn’t see anything in the help file that said that I couldn’t use the same character across different version of the client although when I called EB and asked if they had either the platinum or CE edition of PQ the guy told me that he could not find it in his list. He asked who the publisher was, but I didn’t know. Who is it, then I can order it from them.

Are there any guilds that I can join? I am on the east coast and prefer to play from around 7-11pm EST. I would like to join an active guild that likes to group, and maybe can help me get some better equipment and maybe even take me to a place to power level.

And finally, I need to get more gold which I usually will buy from real world vendor, but since I can’t find the chat/in-game email system, can someone tell me how to enable it. (sorry for ending my Sentence with a preposition - I hate grammar Nazi’s, but I need to get back to the game)

(the post been sitting in my drafts for almost a yr now!)

I am struggling.

How will people view what I am about to do?

How will my mom take it?

How do I even tell her to begin with?

Are these feelings true?

Am I in love?

Or, am I just afraid to loose my special someone?

My life is turned upside down now.

This is a big leap.

And, I am afraid of heights.

Can I be a good husband?

Can I be a good father?

I don’t want to break your heart.

Lets hold hands and do this together.

I want to be your rock you can stand on.

And, I want you to be the caregiver for the rock.

Together forever.

These are my feelings.

Wow! I cannot believe its been over a year now.  I have enjoyed blogging these past 12 months, off and on. Yay me!

Went and saw District 9 last Thursday at midnight showing. Movie was pretty fantastic.  Almost felt real. As if this will happen in the near future.  Animations were spot on, the acting didn’t feel corny, and the aliens were pretty bad ass.

Oh, and The Guild released a great music video.

Well, I am now down to 2 major items, but sadly still need bp ._.

I got the best avatar item of the expansion today though. My trixy bracelet. I cannot wait to melt the other wizzy in guild. Still miffed about it a lil though. A silly troub thought he would bid me up cause he could.. what a fuck face. Oh well, bp in next few months…

edit: and good drops my earring and no dkp to use ._.

Oh, beautiful kite.
You fly just our of my reach.
The winds blowing you around.
I can feel you tug at the string in my hand.
Do I let you go?
Do you like me holding on to you?
Caring for you?
Making sure you don’t hit any trees?
Would you rather me let go and let you fly off into the wind?

Oh, beautiful kite, let me know.
Don’t tease me with your graceful movements in the air.
Wish I could reel you in and touch you.
Maybe, if you don’t want to fly away, when the winds die down.
Hope you at least enjoyed me tugging on your string.
My heart goes with you no matter what you decide.

Oh, beautiful kite, why won’t you just let me know.
I won’t be able to hold on forever….

I want a woman who is proud of who she is and doesn’t care what others think of her.

I want a woman that will steal my gum outta my mouth when we kiss.

I want a woman who understands, it’s ok to pee in the shower.

I want a woman that doesn’t mind wearing girl cloths once in awhile, ie skirt/dress/etc.

I want a woman that likes the idea of pouring gasoline on a cat, setting it on fire and watching it run around the neighborhood.

I want a woman that can let me sleep under the covers, and that doesn’t require it to be pitch black in the room to sleep.

I want a woman that is close to her family.

I want a woman who wears her hair long.

I want a woman to respect that I need my alone time just as much as she does.

I want a woman that appreciates at least ONE of my passions.

I want a woman that sometimes says teehee or other cute stuff.

I want a woman to steal food off my plate and let me be “mad” at her for it.

I want a woman that will make out in the rain together.

I want a woman to push me to be a better man for her.

I want a woman that is intelligent.

I want a woman that lets me pick out outfits for her to wear.

I want a woman that will miss not being held in my arms.

I want a woman who doesn’t smoke or do any drugs.

I want a woman that is honest with her feelings towards herself and to me.

I want a woman that trusts me fully, as I will return the same to her.


Damn, I am picky.


When you find the person who, not only appreciates your faults, but loves you because of them, you know you hit the jackpot.