So, as promised. Something I hope will make someone laugh out loud. Warning, very long post ahead.
I recently posted a craigslisting just to see what the response would be. I had hopes of getting at least ONE actual real response, as I do want someone I can talk to outside of game and relate with that would like to rank up with my sorceress. Yet, I got a bunch of horndogs, blanket messages, and WoW players. My listing I thought was very clear and I will post a pic down below of the listing it self. I specifically asked for someone to quest with… got ZERO people that said they would love to really quest with me in WARHAMMER not WoW, WARHAMMER…. got one person who played WoW and ACTUALLY thought it was a WoW character… last I checked there was no SORCERESS (or even Sorcerer) class in WoW. But I could be wrong… nah I am 100% right.
Ok, first the posting, then the list of responses I got (names taken out and such for protection) for your humor. Sorry to all the guys that were serious and thank you for the ones that made me laugh. Also text in red is my comments on what they said.

Well, looking back on it, I don’t know if I would take it seriously either… wait, this a game character for a mmoRPg, I can Role Play what my character would actually ask, can’t I?… Well maybe it seems to have too many innuendos… but I digress.
Now these are strait copy paste + red text by me, and no, I did not actually respond to any of these people.
______________________________________________________________________________
Is that really you?
And my staff isn’t bigger than the one in the pic. if it was you wouldn’t even talk to me. If you could handle something like that you’d have to find someone that raises horses:) If it is you in the pic what a georgics woman. I’m 5′7 165# and too old for you. Not that I wouldn’t like to keep you company, hold you close, keep you warm, and protect you. If you’re looking for a guy by the hour I’m not the one for you.
Thanks
I enjoy this guys tenacity to tell me he is too old for me but…
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
Executive would love to get to know you……….
You must be very special…………………….
Um ok?
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
You’re funny! Have any real pictures?
That was my real picture dummie.
Fun
Quii
You are beautiful. I would love to meet you. I am strong and waiting to hear from you.
If you are going to respond to an ad like this, at least get the name right.
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Ah yes, btw. These were guys from Bend. After this last email (about 6 hours after it was posted) my listing was flagged and removed…. why? I was being serious and I didn’t break any rules. I was specific in my post as what I was doing and what I was after… Man I dislike people sometimes, nothing better to do than to find a craigslisting and flag it for no reason… That being said, I decided to post the exact thing on PDX which I removed after posting this. I will post the non spam ones.
______________________________________________________________________________
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
Hello:
I live alone in a nice home in the Overlook neighborhood overlooking the river. I have many interests including, biking, swimming, hiking, going to the beach or the mountains, and spending time in the hot tub enjoying the city lights along with a cold beverage.
I am looking for a partner that is fun, positive, romantic, sexy, smart, nice looking, playful, strong but feminine, and someone that likes to laugh & have a good time. I like a woman that is direct, a good communicator. And someone that enjoys receiving attention.
I am attractive, tall, fit, fun, charming, single, romantic, passionate, sensual, secure, successful, clean, safe, normal, humorous, strong, well built, and very sexy.
I would like to hear from you. Now is good or sometime in the future. I would love the opportunity to talk with you. Let’s meet for drinks. Thanks, <name>
Thanks for the email that you sent 50 other people. Also, thanks for the picture of your member, it’s going up on my wall… -.-; mln
Swell Wizard seeking charming Sorceress
Hi Qii,
Nice missive. I love questing and have excellent stamina….so, I
basically sip grindfests for afternoon tea. I am strong! Like manly
man. And I will be your shield, your friend, your confidant.
cheers
~ <name>
ps. It’s not about the size but the power of your staff and how
skillfully you wield it! It is a very handsome and way bigger than
yours. ;)
This one… well, if this had been a personal ad for a person and not a game character and I was a girl, this guy wasn’t half bad. At least he tried.
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
i am strong and i would love to protect you and id put with whatever you say txt me <phone #>
if u wanna know more
First, thanks for the random google image pic of a dude skipping down the street. Second, I appreciate the fact that you will protect me.
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
I read your post and thought it was entertaining.anyway if you want to chat some let me know .Have a fantastic day.
<myspace page>
Thanks for letting me entertain you.
craigslist
Hello, found your add interesting as i am a World of warcraft player. Here is a pic of myself get back to me if interested in talking.
Again… why I was frustrated in the first paragraph of this post.. THIS IS NOT WOW, WHY THE F*** WOULD I CARE IF YOU PLAY WOW????
Mysterious Warlock Seeks Beautiful Sorceress
Take one large, iron cauldron, properly warded with glyphs to prevent interference from random demons, imps, and other such contaminants…
Pour into the cauldron the following brew:
6 bottles of dark beer…
3 cups of good coffee…
1 bottle of red, red wine…
1 measure of blood, sweat, and tears…
a cup of inspiration…
a fresh heart…
a measure of massage oil… olive oil works well in a pinch.
essential oils…
and copious amounts of imagination.
Stir vigorously over a blazing fire, with a bone staff.
Repeat the mantra, ‘I am looking for an eclectic boyfriend… make it happen!’
If properly performed, this spell will result in either a genuine ‘right man’ or at least an interesting date.
Serves one.
Bon appetit!
–<name>
I liked this one. He probably spent a good hour or two coming up with this. He must be a writer or something, maybe . Though a writer could read and understand what the listing was actually about, so maybe not.
Gorillanitas ten thousand dragon sniper niner
I’m 21 I like Guitars, metal, video games, movies, science fiction, epic journey’s over the mountains and across the oceans. her are some pics, later
I am not sure what the Subject line is supposed to mean, but I guess it would grab your attention and want to know what it was…
(no subject)
Hey there;
My name is <name>. I live in Gresham. I am 6′1” tall and weigh 190 lbs. Got a Harley !!! Lets ride and take in this sun while it lasts !! I can send a pic with my phone..
<NAme> (he capitolized the first 2 letters of his name…)
I am glad you have a harley, my game character can do lots with it…
Beautiful Sorceress
I would like to cast an enchantment spell on you so we can go to your library where I can show you my staff if you’re willing to do some alchemy work with me. I’m hoping that there is some sort of explosive reactions mixing my components and yours. If not I guess you can just go back to your familiar and I’ll just polish my wand.
I actually laughed out loud on this one. Too bad he will be “polishing his wand” by himself. Give him props for tying at least.
lol do you play wow
hey whats up ? send your pic
Again, NO.
Your funny craigslist posting
I can be your tank.
But enough nerdiness. Is this a serious post? Because I like gamer chicks.
Glad you thought it was funny, I wasn’t being funny.
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
You only play WoW?
Did I mention how hard it was to not send an email back correcting these idiots???
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
Hi~
I saw your ad and I am very interested! My name is <name> and I’m 35 years old. I’m 5’10” and an average build. I have a goatee and I’ve been considering getting my ears pierced again (though I haven’t done it yet). Currently, I live in Gresham and I’m a computer technician.
So, a little about me. In my spare time I like to spend time with my friends and family. A lot of times, this means playing around with computers (my system is named Vindicator and is pretty rockin’). I play a lot of games on the PC and consider myself a “gamer.” I go to a large gaming LAN and tournament about twice a year. In the summer I love to go camping, hiking, and riding Waverunners with my best friends. I’m also a musician; I play the Alto Sax and synthesizers. Several years back I was in a local industrial band named <band name here>, but I’m not currently in a band. My musical tastes range from jazz to classic rock to current music. Pretty much all over the place.
I have a Myspace page at if you want to know a bit more about me or see some other pics of me at <myspace page>
If you’d like to know more about me, I’d love to hear back from you!
<name>
I wanted to know the name of your computer, the one I am using to post this is called “Lappy” and my main computer is called “Shiro”, thanks. Also, thanks for including a screenshot of your WoW character, I really wanted that…/kill me now
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
Hello, I really liked what you had to say . So where to start ??? Guess I’ll tell you a bit about me and see what happens.
I’m 5′ 5″ and about 150 pounds. I worked as a chef since I was 15 but have recently changed careers to a ware house manager. I have short light brown hair and Hazel / green eyes. My best friends wife would describe me as a romantic gentleman with a bad boy rep. I’m 3/4 th French and have family in Marsielle France. I studied Tae Kwon Do for a long time and am in good shape…(edidted out all the rest of the stuff he said about himself for post length)
Have a great night . Hope to hear from you soon. <name>
I liked what you had to say too, and I took the time to read it… did you even read what I said?
grind fest
hi Qii whats a grind fest? munkysilVa over…..
Well munkysilVa, it’s when you kill a bunch of monsters over and over to gain experience or item drops. Thanks for the question you sent in.
Sorceress… - Re: Craigslist Ad
I put on my robe and wizard hat…
Have any real pictures? That is, if your ad was at all serious.
Again, my real picture, and again I wanted a person to quest with, so yes I WAS SERIOUS.
RE: Beautiful Sorceress looking for the right Man. : Rank - 21
Hello My name is <name>, I am 5′10 , 26 years old and live in Beaverton
I am a nerd I also love music and have a very eclectic taste in music
but my favorite style is punk. I spend most of my free time playing
around on my computer and PS2 or watching movies and TV. I work full
time and have my own place and like to cook. I have played WoW for years
but Right now I am playing Warhammer Online.
If you would like to chat my YAHOO and AIM screen name is <screen name>
Since when is punk eclectic? AND OMG SOMEONE THAT ATLEAST PLAYS WARHAMMER! Thank you for your picture of your Chosen, in its purple armor glory. I might send an email back to him to see about the REAL listing I did to see what server he is on…

holy cow
that’s the funniest/best ad I’ve ever read! I say that from one nerd to another. Live long and prosper my friend. I’d roll a 20 sided die to get the chance to see your picture.
Starwars > Startrek. And the dice rolled not in your favor, sorry your luck isn’t better. Thanks for the compliment on my post though.
looks like a night elf…
Too bad… I stay away from elves… they can’t be trusted. =D
Oh, close, but it’s a dark elf to be exact. WoW has Night elves though, you should try there.
Rank 24!
Nice post, I had a good laugh.
My Arch Mage digs on Dark Elves by the way.
Not sure if he was just trying to brag that he is higher rank or the fact that he plays on the Order side. At least he knew what I was talking about.
howdy ma’am
Got more pic? So tell me more about you .. Where are you at in portland? I’m in wilsonville. I am a little aggressive, very understanding, but always passionate. I like your ad..not quite short but to the point. Do you like italians? You definately got my attention- I LOVE LOVE LOVE good girls who like being bad… We could have alot of fun together!
I am ex-military, 420 friendly, std free, 6ft and 210lbs, 25 yrs old full blooded italian male w/ tat’s, hazel green eyes, short dark hair, a smooth goatee, and plenty of stamina! I’m total a workahloic, very professional, but hours are flexable and would love to see what is out there. On my freetime, I play alot of halo 3, and used to play WOW. I’m a total animal lover, I have 2 cats who are my lil homies. I was a wildchild, but am nothing but a square bear now a’days.. Just work and go to local events (tons of concerts, boxing, wwe,ufc, nba, and the minor league baseball, basically whatever free tickets I can get from the car dealership I work at!) I have been around the world twice, and now I’m here for you!
..some other great qualities about me include:
Brave
Inteligent
Geniune
Peaceful
Enthusiastic
Non-discriminating
Inspired
Self-assured
(If all else fails, then just read the capitol letters…)
I’m STILL at work (want to buy a car?), so hit me up- lets chat!
You like my ad? You never once said you like to quest, another blanket email… And, I thought the stereotype for italians was a small…
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After 24 hour period on craigslist, total people that knew what warhammer was : 2.
So, I learned a few things from this. I had been conteplating the online dating scene for a few months now. Have read quite a bit of stuff out there as well. I now know what women were complaining about. Competent males responding back to them PERSONALLY, ie not sending the same email to 50 people.
Also, I learned that people on craigslist can’t understand what people are trying to say. Honestly, if I had seen that post I would have sent them my user name and server name and would have asked what server they were on, but that’s just me.
Anyways, peace.
Ninja Edit: Did I mention I disliked World of Warcraft? Watch out Blizzard I think Mythic is going to give you a run for your money. You are old, and the new kid on the block is selling better crack than you.